"When we meet someone we like and feel sexy about, this is not an indication that that person will fit precisely into the empty space in our lives. And it will not work to make a point-by-point evaluation of a potential playmate, scoring her according to how closely she matches up to our fantasy of the ideal partner. Putting our own needs and fantasies foremost gets in the way of actually meeting another person, and enjoying the wonderful surprises involved in getting to know who that person is."

-- The Ethical Slut